Rainy day

Recalling for a moment that this is the northwest, you might think it's comical that I'm proud of myself for going for a walk in the rain this morning. We're all totally on the mend, no more cold or flu, and with a hot cup of tea and a big breakfast, this has already been a great day. Normally I would say, except for the rain, but it was awesome to take C out for a walk in her turbo-charged jogging stroller, all decked out with super impermeable rain fly and rocket design. We walked through some trails nearby, and she sang songs until the last few blocks when she fell asleep. She's back to a two nap/day schedule right now, which seems to be helping her get better.

Her 1st birthday is this weekend. I can't even believe it. We're having a party with friends and a bunch of kidlets ranging in age from 6 months to 4 years. We're going to do a deep clean tomorrow and sanitize all her toys. I'm just glad we managed to get through this in time to not have to cancel her first big party, that would have been sad.

One year. I can't believe it's been a year since I was bundled up and walking through the neighborhood trying to get my contractions going, eating spicy Szechuan in the hopes that the old wive's tale was true and I'd be able to jump-start labor without having to be induced. We went to the doctor on the 12th and had an ultrasound, and discovered that I was dangerously low on amniotic fluid and that the baby was out of room. The ultrasound tech told me to get ready to be admitted, she was sure I was going to be induced, and we just looked at each other with this mix of elation and fear, thinking about everything from Oh my God it's time, to sh*t, we forgot to bring an overnight bag with us. Funny how that overnight bag feels so important, and how it totally isn't. And then two days later we welcomed Cora into the world, full of joy and relief as we looked at this brand new being, everything intact, tiny and hungry.

Trying to put it in words would sound too precious and sentimental, I think, for this forum. It's one of those moments you remember all your life, something so tangible you can take it out and look at it anytime you want, polishing it between your hands until it is so smooth it shines.

I will never forget the thought I had just before she was born: I want her to be a free spirit. Celtic music was playing while she was born, and I had this image of her standing on the Cliffs of Moher in Ireland, looking out at rugged waters and rocks. We overlay so many of our own experiences on our kids, sometimes it can't be helped. When I looked out at the water from the Cliffs of Moher, I just remember feeling grateful to be there, happy to feel the wind on my face. I have this image of Cora traversing the world, seeing everything, having conversations with strangers on trains and in little cafes. She might be nothing like that, but I can't help thinking she has a bit of freedom singing through her veins.

This is going to be a homey day, I'm making turkey chili and cleaning house. We're going on a few errands, maybe we'll visit B during lunch. We'll probably use our newfound energy to rock the house with some major dance party tunes, play hide and seek and scream around the house with Cora's new shriek that she recently discovered while being chased by her dad.